Feeling better.

There’s soooo much going on these days that it really takes a toll on personal well-being. I feel divided myself between wanting to feel at peace in my own space and bringing my bitch attitude to the foreground because innocent people are always taking the fall for greedy, unethical and morally compromised people. I wonder if people like that even have an empathetic gene because I cannot for the life of all that there is, understand how people can be so without understanding for the pain that they cause other people.

I suppose when you put a great distance between the ‘elites’ and everyone else, it becomes easier like people tend to kill less when it’s done with their bare hands instead of a gun. I think, maybe, it has to do with actual physical connections that prevent people from doing deplorable things. I think that’s something that humanity has lost in the last decade.

Certainly there has to be more to it than that because it’s happened since the dawn of man just not like it has been happening over the last decade. Anyways. It’s hard to look at it head on and hard to look away. I know for myself that justice is a big deal. People are a big deal even whenI don’t really want to hang out all the time. It’s too draining most anything that involves dealing with people’s emotions or lack of becomes a drain. Not a drag but physically and mentally draining.

I wish all the time that I could change the world but it always feel inevitable that the world can or will change. Too much emphasis on what is not here and not enough on what is today. Facebook alone has shown way more than I ever wanted to know about people’s beliefs and motivations. I liked it better when my brain was being drained by ideas in space and non religious spiritual growth and mind boggling philosophy.

Those days seem too few and everything we do seems (no matter what it is) scrutinized. I also fall into the scrutinizing because it’s difficult for me to not when someone comes to me with overbearing ideas about how I should live and what god is and tribalism and what love is… it never seems to end. I’d rather be open than completely closed but the world makes me feel like I should be closed off just to preserve the love that I do feel.

There’s no good option these days. I can ignore snd let others die without caring or doing anything to try and prevent these things and be happy or strive to change it in anyway I can but feel the hated emotions that people bring with them.

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